So since I never posted anything I wrote while I was in Israel and I am now in Spain with nothing to do because I just got here and have no clue what to do yet, I figured it’s now or never for posting my thoughts on Israel, so here goes nothing:
Here I am. Sitting on a plane on the way to Frankfurt, Germany to connect to Tel Aviv. The past few months have brought some changes to my opinion of what a normal christian walk with the Lord should look like. I’m not sure how successful I will be at getting them all out in a well organized manner but I think it’s the best thing for me to do to maximize spiritual growth on my trip to Israel.
First, my walk with the Lord shouldn’t survive from one spiritual high to the other. Learning that really shook up my whole perspective on my walk with the Lord. CFO, Passion, Amplify, retreats, etc. can’t be what gets me by. After all I posses the most radically life changing Book in history and know the all knowing God and He has adopted me as his daughter.
Next, Jesus lives in my heart all the time. I know this in my head but I don’t live like it at all. Still. Why is it so easy for me to forget that Jesus not only sees what I am doing but has to live in the body doing it [or saying it].
Thrid, life is not one big movie about me. Again, I know this but don’t live like it. Everything is not for my comfort. I serve my desires before the Lords. “Lucky for Him I desire to live for Him.” I see what I think is good and do it before I wait on His answer, but don’t worry, it’s a good Christian thing to do. Sometimes I wonder if He was more pleased with me when I was loving people who needed loving most, despite my ignorance. He was probably up there saying “ok now quit doing the things the world does and you’ve got it!”
Fourth. Everything I was ever made to do is about His Glory. Now that I said “ok Jesus you can have me, I’m willing” He isn’t going to let anything work out unless it’s for His kingdom. People who haven’t surrendered don’t have that problem because He gave us free will.
Fifth. Jesus died the most horrific death… worse than curb-stomping (something I consider to be the most painful thing imaginable), for the sins of the world. THough He died for everyone, He would have died for just me. Nothing about me is special accept Jesus. If I were sinless or non existent, He would have died for someone else.
Sixth. Jesus loves every single person as much as He loves me. He cares for them as much as He cares for me. Again, I am not special in any way but for some reason He loves me a lot. It’s beautiful.
There are, however, a few personal revelations of mine that have grown me in a more adult like way (rather than making me feel like a child in Christ as the previous points do). Unfortunately, as with all my thoughts, they mostly deal with relationships. I have always tried to be the first person to do something that needed to be done and no one else would do. For example, leave Glades Day, go to college, and not go through a “wild” phase. I guess “be the change you want to see in the world” hit me harder than most. At Harvest Queen I got really convicted about purity. Those girls at home have so few examples of a pure, Biblical relationship, especially one that is happening right before their eyes. I’m the person who only had the desire to party in high school so I could relate to people far from Christ. I got a
little too wrapped up in it, but it really shows my personality. So now I have this desire to set an example of a Biblical relationship. However, seeing as it wasn’t even a year ago when I realized a man should pursue a woman, and friday that I realized purity goes beyond virginity, I understand why He might be holding things off. I’m not even sure what a Biblical relationship looks like. But the Lord will use that too. He loves to use flaws.
So that’s where I am. I needed it on paper so It would quit pulling me back from growth. Time to be a tourist.
Sitting by the Sea of Galilee
Today I was baptized in the Jordan River. Twice. Brooke had to switch the cameras and didn’t get it in time, but it’s all good. I’ve just decided that now that I know what “the normal Christian life” should look like, it’s time to start living it. The Holy Spirit shouldn’t just be in me on the Spiritual highs; I should live every day like Jesus is in me. I know He is but I rarely act like I’m the temple of a King. It’s more like we are just roommates in the same house, He has His stuff and I have mine. Yes He’s there but I’m just sharing with Him. It isn’t until now that I realized I am a castle. He is the King and my job is to wait on Him. Yes that can be fun, but sometimes there are some really hard things I have to do. Most of the time. Just thoughts going through my head. Thought I would write them down.
One of the most striking things in Israel was looking at Jerusalem from where Jesus sweat blood. That was the city He was hurting for. Granted, it looked a lot different then [No Mosques or Muslim grave yard since Islam doesn’t happen until after Jesus]. Do I love my city and care for the lost of it that much? Or do I casually let them go about their lives doing the things they think are best. Every person on this earth is called to worship the King of kings and Lord of lords. I’m sorry if this offends, but I have been too cautious and it’s produced no fruit. I love loving the lost, but do I love bringing them the Gospel? I have to fully and truly fall in love with Christ and it will just overflow out of me.
The streets of Jerusalem. Film.
The “Old Wall” of Jerusalem. More like what it would have looked like when Jesus was there. Film.
The Wilderness Jesus was temped in.
The view that Jesus would have had the night before He died minus the light. Imagine a whole night in the dark in a pit just to think about what had just happened and what was going to happen. Chilling.